Monthly Archives: June 2005

Rolling Stone loves “Lous XIV”

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To: Rolling Stone Magazine
Attn: Proofreading department

witz.org was reading this article on RollingStone.com when we noticed an advertorial banner for a Windows XP sponsored online concert with some crazy new band called Lous XV.

witz.org is familiar with San Diego’s Louis XIV, but is not hip to the sound of Lous XIV just yet. Is it pronounced Lou’s Ex-Eye-Vee?

Sincerely,

witz.org

(The offending banner can be seen in full after the jump…)

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Suddenly, it was tough to watch “Entourage”

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witz.org’s favorite Sunday show, Entourage, won’t be quite as enjoyable anymore after seeing the above picture and learning the terrible truth about star Kevin Connolly (Eric): he is dating the fairly icky Nicky Hilton. We think Nicky is more of a Turtle girl, and not Eric material.

Nicky Hilton and her boyfriend Kevin Connolly head to her car after doing a bit of shopping at Fred Segal Clothing Store in West Hollywood.

(via Other Pics)

You and I are gonna Live Forever

Amazing story in the L.A. Times today about super-old folks, people so old the remember the nineties – the 1890’s.

For kicks, here is a list of the oldest living Americans. Subtract your age from their age – they were already old when you were born:

The 10 oldest Americans

1. Elizabeth Bolden, Tenn. 114. Born Aug. 15, 1890.

2. Bettie Wilson, Miss. 114. Born Sept. 13, 1890.

3. Susie Gibson, Ala. 114. Born Oct. 31, 1890.

4. Grace Thaxton, Ky. 114. Born June 18, 1891.

5. M. Gladys Swetland, Pa. 113. Born April 18, 1892.

6. Moses Hardy, Miss. 112. Born Jan. 6, 1893.

7. Lydia Newton, Ariz. 112. Born March 23, 1893.

8. Edna Parker, Ind. 112. Born April 20, 1893.

9. Grace Jones, Va. 112. Born June 4, 1893.

10. Marion Higgins, Calif. 111. Born June 26, 1893.

Source: Gerontology Research Group at grg.org

READ: Los Angeles Times: Hitting the Big Eleven-O

Pete Doherty: Mr. Kate Moss?

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Is Pete Doherty about to become the latest Mr. Kate Moss? Rumors continue to circulate that the ex-Libertine will wed Moss at Glastonbury.

Before he does that, Pete may want to zip up his fly – as seen above, he performed a Glastonbury set with his band Babyshambles while leaving his barn door wide open.

WATCH: Babyshambles (and others) live from Glastonbury

A 6/26/05 update: Total scam, per usual in the British Press.

MOSS “MARRIES” DOHERTY: Supermodel KATE MOSS and her rock star lover PETE DOHERTY have wed at this year’s (05) GLASTONBURY FESTIVAL in southwest England – in a fake ceremony.

British beauty Moss and the BABYSHAMBLES frontman yesterday (25JUN05) took part in the mock wedding, which is only valid for one day, at the site’s Chapel Of Love And Loathing In Lost Vagueness.

After the ceremony, the couple celebrated their pretend marriage by dancing to GEORGE MICHAEL song FAITH and the HUMAN LEAGUE’s TELL ME WHEN at a party held by clothing company DIESEL.

A Chapel Of Love spokesperson refused to comment, saying, “I do not expose my guests to the media glare.”

[email protected] Radar Magazine: Revive Dynamite!

(Chewbacca pictured with Shaun Cassidy)

While witz.org thinks Radar is a fine publication (though it does remind us of Spy) and worthy of a resurrection, we think if you were going to resurrect a title, Mort Zuckerman should have sunk his $$$ into bringing back Dynamite!.

For those too young to remember, Dynamite! was a children’s magazine in the late ’70s that was available through Scholastic Book Order magazines that got distributed at public schools. With covers like “Catching Up With Logan’s Run!, witz.org can’t fathom how Dynamite ceased publication.

Read: Dynamite!: The Magazine

P.S. Note to Radar: ease up on the Tom Cruise Scientology stories. You are starting to sound like witz.org.

(Chewbacca pictured with Shaun Cassidy)

Cruise, Cruise, and Lohan = crazy on the couch!

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First, Pre-Katie Holmes engaged Tom Cruise goes batshit crazy in love on Oprah, followed by…

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Not yet engaged but trying to save face, Scientology-spin-control Tom Cruise goes on Jay Leno’s Tonight Show and tries his best to sooth fan fears that he has lost it by poking fun at his Oprah appearance, then…

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Inexplicably, Lindsay Lohan does “The Tom Cruise Couch Dance” on Leno, setting off some bizarre reaction where she exposes more Lohan than neccessary.

(Photos via Defamer and JJB)