MK & Ash! 18+, no minors

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The day is upon us, as those adorable Olsen Twins finally turn legal this weekend with the arrival of their 18th birthday.

What better way to celebrate than with the unveiling of the twins senior year high school photos, above (though witz.org is still unsure which one is Mary-Kate, and which is Ashley).

Congrats on matriculating joining the adult world, Olsens!

(Photos courtesy Ultragrrrl)

UPDATE: Welcome Farkers (fark.com) and Defamers (defamer.com). As my bandwidth slowly dies, witz.org salutes you….

127 thoughts on “MK & Ash! 18+, no minors

  1. Alana

    Dear Suave Gay,

    How would you know if their movies are shitty unless you’ve seen one? And if you’ve seen one, then you’ve already contributed $8.50 to their lifetime bundle of $$$. So rag on them all you want – YOU GO, GRRRRRRLZ!!!

    BTW, the American’s haven’t ruined the English language anywhere near as badly as the English have ruined edible food!

  2. obliterate

    Alana, thanks for bringing some smiles to an OB’s Friday night (that’s OB as in Old Bastard…though I choose not to say just how freakin’ old). You’ve made this thread much more fun for than expected. I’ve enjoyed your tittilation. Matrafact, I already knows I likes you “a whole lot.” :)

    And, no, I have no interest in Ahnold, no matter how big his bulges are, nor were they are located. Like Conan the Barbarian, I prefer “the lamenting of the women.”

  3. Alana

    Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!!

    Was that a good enough lament for ya, OB?

    And, jeeeez… the last time I brought smiles to a guy’s face on a Friday night I wasn’t using my ‘puter!!!

    All I gots to say iz: If you get tittilated by a cyber-thread, YOU MUST BE PRETTY FREAKIN’ OLD!!!!

    (ror)

  4. Alana

    Hey O.B. – I want you to know that I’ve been pulling your string all evening.

    (I JUST COULDN’T RESIST!!!! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha)

  5. obliterate

    Now don’t go getting the big head, Alana. Unless, of course, you like getting the big head…or giving it

    string…(cyber-)thread…whatever unravels ya, sweetpea :)
    it’s all good

  6. Go to Hell

    Any fucker who was counting down the days till the turned 18 is a closet pedophile. I bet you assholes would screw a 13-year old if she told you she was 18.

  7. lumpter

    “Hi”

    I don’t want to be *even more* of a grammar Nazi (what ever happened to Godwin’s law?), but you changed tense in your original post. In addition to that micro-blunder, you made use of a sentence fragment instead of a properly formed sentence. To just address the problem of tense:

    “Because I would feel like a farking idiot if I was being a high handed language whore and at the same time misspell my completely pretentious diatribe”

    should have read:

    “Because I would feel like a farking idiot if I was being a high handed language whore and at the same time *misspelled* my completely pretentious diatribe”

    There are larger conflicts at work here. Why is it that the legality of sexual congress takes precidence over the genuine morality of it all. Does one day change anything other than an arbitrary restriction put upon us by a overbearingly puritanical society and system of government?

    What is wrong with having sex with someone who is 16 or 17? What if one is 18, 20, 30, 60? If we can try a 14 year old as an adult for murder, can we not find it reasonable to trust that 14 year old with the regulation of sexual behavior or, better yet, to vote?

  8. Hippocratic

    Lumpter,
    You don’t belong here. You belong with us. Somewhere else. Somewhere better and utopic. (Note: Use of sentence fragments constitutes “poetic license,” a mythological term used to ignore rules in favour of achieving a desired effect.) This forum is beneath you. Much like its contributors would like the Olsen twins to be. Please find your way to your own end of the gene pool, and stop swimming in these muddy waters.

  9. Ali

    Isn’t one of them anorexic? Perhaps the heroin addict?

    Apologies if this has already been covered. Too many replies…so much apathy.

  10. Steefoo

    Funny how the discussion went from “Oh I think they’re hot!” to NAZI being an acronym, to them fucking footbal players back to “Oh I think they’re hot!”. I just love free speach! (Oh! and to those who do not like my english grammar, must I add that I am french???) Sorry!

  11. MisterKen

    Yummm…love eatin’ up that bandwidth.

    Ok, $10 says they are doing Penthouse before they turn 25. Who’s in?

  12. Ogden

    I don’t know who these girls are but I think they’re really ugly… look at the size of their heads, they’re huge!

  13. lowdose

    Whether or not these two have had sex with other individuals is of little to no importance. They have enjoyed a fruitful acting career early on in life and of course had to deal with all that comes with. I think that all of the people for who have commented here specifically about sex need to get up and live your own lives. In other words, stop pretending to live a life in which is not yours. Probably if you go into life yearning to sleep with every woman walking the planet you will find yourself with nothing at all to show for your sorry existence. I doubt any one is reading this due to the amount of time that has passed since the original post. To the Olsen twins who will never see this and probably know this already: Be happy with yourself and never listen to anything others tell you. Oh and Happy Birthday!

  14. Mary

    the olsen’s are ugly as fuck!
    They should be shot for not having boobs, ass, decent face and such a horrible nose. (not to mention their ridiculously “I’m sexy smile”) PLEASEEEEEEEEE EAT SKANKS!
    They’re hideous. they disgust me.

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